Parshat Vayechi 5778 - Life Above Death

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Rabbi Naftali Kassorla

Parshat Vayechi 5778

Life Above Death

The D’var Torah for this week is dedicated in memory of:
ר׳ אלחנן יעקב ז״ל בן מורי וחמי ר׳ שמואל פנחס

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In this week's parsha, after all the tumultuous episodes in his life, Yaakov knows his time is coming to an end. And just as his father Yitzchak had done, and his father Avraham before them, he attempts to sort out his affairs and bless his children. He requests of Yosef not to bury him in Egypt, rather his will is to be buried in Eretz Yisrael, with his forefathers and wife Leah in the Ma’arat Hamachpela. Later he blesses Ephraim and Menashe and all the rest of the Shevatim. Ultimately Yaakov’s mission in this world draws to a close as the Torah says: “When Yaakov finished instructing his sons, he drew in his feet onto the bed; he expired and was brought in to his people” (Bereishit 49:33). Thus concludes the difficult life of Yaakov Avinu.

The Gemara in Ta’anit (5b) makes a perplexing statement:

א''ר יוחנן יעקב אבינו לא מת

Rav Yochanan said: Yaakov, our forefather, did not die

There are a multitude of explanations of this statement; some interpret it literally, others allegorically. However, Rav Tzadok Hakohen M’Lublin, in his Sefer Resisei Layla (אות נו׳) explains that Yaakov perfected himself to such an extent by living on such a high spiritual level. Consequently, while the physical body is normally at odds with the spiritual, for Yaakov Avinu, the body was not a contradiction to his soul. Death, as stated in Kabbalah, is the difficult process of the soul being removed from the body, known as חיבוט הקבר. As the soul moves to the next world, it is confronted with the decay of the body. Since the soul has been housed in the body for so many years, this process serves to “re-train” the soul to dissociate itself from the body, a very painful ordeal.

However, says the Resisei Layla, Yaakov had so completely divested himself of the physical world that the process of “death” meant as little to him as one who removes a coat. The transition of the soul leaving the body was merely the shedding of an ancillary skin. In this way, death did not exist for Yaakov, thus: “Yaakov, our forefather, did not die”.

Still, I have wondered, what was so significant in particular about Yaakov Avinu that he reached this exalted status? Did not Avraham and Yitzchak Avinu also live on such “angelic” levels that they too should be considered as having “not died”?

Rashi in Vayeishev (Ibid. 37:1) quotes the Midrash Rabbah (פד-ג): 

וישב: ביקש יעקב לישב בשלוה, קפץ עליו רוגזו של יוסף…

Yaakov desired to dwell in tranquility, [but] the pain of [the] [episode of] Yosef seized upon him.

The Midrash elaborates that Hashem exclaimed: “Is it not enough that the righteous will receive their share in the World To Come, but they also want tranquility in this world?” It Seemingly, Hashem in a sense deliberately gives challenges and withholds “rest” from the righteous, in this world. But why? What does this accomplish for them? And what is wrong with desiring tranquility? Is it not conducive to accomplishing our goals? Wouldn't a life of serenity allow Yaakov the “head space” to grow further in his service of Hashem?

In discussing this Midrash, the Alter of Novhoradok Rav Yosef Yoizel Hurwitz זצ״ל in Madreigas Ha’Adam (נקודת האמת) makes an important distinction. There are two distinct – and very different – states of being that a person can experience: שלוה and מנוחה. Shalva, explains the Alter, is when all of a person’s needs are met. Of course, in this state, a person can find a sense of calm and achieve great things. However it has one caveat: the moment one is lacking any particular “need,” he can be thrown into a tizzy of confusion or even madness, thus uprooting all his gains. Menucha, on the other hand is a much loftier level with greater stability. It is a state where man has peace of mind, not because his needs have been met, but rather despite the lack of those “needs.” He has risen above; he has, in fact, uprooted his desires completely and is unchained – able to grow as he wishes.

The Alter explains that this was the “mistake” that Yaakov made in his request. For Yaakov was not asking to live in this elevated state of Menucha, but rather he sought Shalva. He wished to live out his final days in tranquility serving Hashem as his father had done. In response, Hashem sent Yaakov the episodes of Yosef. According to the explanation of the Alter, Hashem did this in order to convey to Yaakov the following message: the only way to truly grow is through challenges. When faced with difficulties, if a person rises to the occasion, he can discover strengths within himself that he did not know existed. Rather than avoid dealing with the challenge and being left “as is,” he gains tools to handle anything which comes his way. These gains are concrete, everlasting acquisitions; they cannot be shaken when he is faced with lack of needs. Now, he has no needs. He has only strength.

However, a person's response to pain and trauma can go in two directions: he can either bow to the pain, and let it overtake him, causing him to subconsciously build a protective shell which separates himself from humanity. Or he can embrace the challenge and allow it to be the harbinger of personal change, from a mere man of flesh and blood, to a totally different being – an elevated being that “does not die.” Not because he is entirely out of this world, but because he has risen beyond, through the realities of this world. Trials and tribulations have the power to cleanse one from the alluring facades of this world – to give him a laser-sharp focus on what is truly important: G-d, Torah, Family, and Chesed.

Yaakov suffered immeasurably in this world: in his dealings with Eisav, Dinah's capture, Lavan’s trickery, the death of Rachel, Yosef's long absence. But he had indeed risen to a higher level through his “few and bad...years of his life” (Ibid. 47:9 – Yaakov describing his life to Pharoah). Yaakov’s comment to Pharaoh, was a statement of fact. His life did not compare to the quality of life that of his fathers, yet he had risen to a new elevated status. Yaakov achieved a state where he was not attached to this world, and this lack of attachment to his body meant that he did not die, a truly exalted praise indeed.

We should be blessed with the fortitude of Yaakov to be strengthened by difficulty. Through our personal challenges, may we be able to recognize our own strengths, which can then then use to grow in our connection to Hashem and development of our true values in life.

Shabbat Shalom

Parshat Vayigash 5778 - Nothing Too Small

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Rabbi Naftali Kassorla

Parshat Vayigash 5778

Nothing Too Small

The D’var Torah for this week is dedicated in memory of:
ר׳ אלחנן יעקב ז״ל בן מורי וחמי ר׳ שמואל פנחס

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In this week’s parsha, the episode of Yosef and his brothers culminates with their reunion. Yosef finally reveals himself, and all appears to be forgiven as Yosef proclaims, “Do not be distressed, nor reproach yourself for having sold me here, for it was to be a provider that G-d sent me ahead of you… Thus G-d has sent me ahead of you to ensure your survival in the land and to sustain you for a momentous deliverance” (Bereishit 45:5-7).

In this light, Yosef offers that the brothers move down to Goshen, promising to support them, saying, “And I will provide for you there, for there will be five more years of famine, so you do not become destitute – you, your household, and all that is yours” (ibid.11). 

The Ba’al Haturim discusses Yosef’s insistence that his family come down to מצרים: “It is good for you to come here [Egypt] even if it means to leave the land of Israel, for you may become destitute in Torah, as you may not be able to learn Torah because of the famine…” The Ba’al Haturim explains that the motivation for the family to move was not a material concern, but rather a spiritual one; that perhaps the famine may cause them to “become destitute” in their learning. 

The justification of leaving the land to protect one’s Torah study is not without precedent, as codified in the Rambam (Melachim 5:9): “It is always prohibited to go from the land of Israel to outside of the land, except to study Torah or to marry a woman or to save (possessions) from non-Jews, and [then] to return to the land. And so [too] may he go out for business. But to dwell outside the Land is prohibited unless there is intense famine…” The Rambam lists three reasons to allow one to temporarily leave Eretz Yisrael, and among them is to study Torah. However, if an intense famine strikes, it is permitted to live outside the Land, even for an extended period of time.

Why does the Ba’al Haturim base the reason for leaving the Land, not on account of the famine, but for Torah learning? From the Rambam cited above, we see that starvation is apparently a more serious concern, as it is even permitted to dwell in chutz l’aretz due to famine, while for Torah, one is only allowed to leave temporarily. Why is Torah study (or lack thereof) highlighted as that which necessitated leaving the Land in this particular case?

Additionally, what does the Ba’al Haturim mean in saying that the Shevatim would become “destitute in Torah”? Are we not talking about our great ancestors? How is it possible that they would become destitute, ie. completely lacking, in Torah study due to a famine? The very idea that they would abandon their Torah because of a difficult circumstance seems preposterous.

Perhaps we can suggest that the Ba’al Haturim is communicating a profound insight about the study of Torah. Of course the Shevatim would have continued to study while remaining in the Land of Israel, even amidst the famine. Nonetheless, despite their dedication, the famine would inevitably affect their learning on the most minute level. In some miniscule way, their understanding and diligence might might be lacking. Even this small, perhaps indiscernible decrease in learning necessitated leaving the Land.

This is a novel idea, for one could think that the allowance to leave the Land of Israel to learn Torah only applies to those who are unable learn at all in the Land, or if their staying in Israel would be a severe impediment to their success in Torah study. But how do we know that if someone were to encounter a slight drop, that he would be permitted to leave? Thus, we learn from the Shevatim and their move that even the slightest decrease in one's Torah learning is terribly tragic – it requires leaving Eretz Yisrael! We can show us how much Torah is truly worth.

With this explanation in mind we are more able to better appreciate every bit of Torah, no matter how “small.” In truth, when it comes to Torah learning, nothing is small and no attainment is insignificant. Therefore, even the potential loss of a “tiny amount” is taken with utmost seriousness. Each piece of Torah is immensely valuable in its own right as well as a step towards even greater knowledge.

This idea can be very helpful for us, in this all-or-nothing, black-and-white generation. Too often, we can fall into despair, feeling that our achievements are worthless; or that if we were to undertake something new, we would not succeed. This is a cancerous attitude, which only serves to infringe on our happiness – the ultimate key to progress. And happiness aside, this mentality surely stunts any potential growth, as it forces us into defeat before we even begin! Rather, we should learn from the Shevatim, that if even a slight decrease in Torah learning is serious enough to leave the Land, it must mean that every bit of Torah, and every bit of growth, makes a world of difference.

A negative, all-or-nothing mindset must be avoided at all costs and discarded immediately. Rather, we should learn to view any and all accomplishments not only a sign of progress, but as having tremendous value unto themselves. They can then foster a positive attitude which will be the key to our ultimate, higher goals.

We should be blessed with this level of spiritual recognition and inculcate this attitude of growth within ourselves. 

Shabbat Shalom

Parshat Mikeitz 5778: G-d Willing

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Rabbi Naftali Kassorla

Parshat Mikeitz 5778

אם ירצה ה׳ - G-d Willing

The D’var Torah for this week is dedicated in memory of:
ר׳ אלחנן יעקב ז״ל בן מורי וחמי ר׳ שמואל פנחס

If you are interested in sponsoring a D’var Torah in honor or in memory of someone, or for any occasion, please email: ParshaParagraphs@gmail.com

Last week’s parsha concludes with Yosef in prison after having been accused of assaulting Potiphar’s wife. Placed with the Sar Ha’mashkim and the Sar Ha’ofim, he successfully interprets their dreams. Yosef requests of the Sar Ha’mashkim to remember him and mention his name to Pharaoh to be released. However, the Sar Ha'mashkim forgets, and Chazal say that as a punishment for putting faith in the wrong place, Yosef remained confined for an extra two years. Next, Pharaoh is stricken with dreams for which he cannot find a meaningful interpretation. Finally, the Sar Ha’mashkim recalls Yosef and suggests that he be summoned to interpret the dreams.

Pharaoh sends for Yosef, and in a flash he is brought before Pharaoh. Pharaoh gives great honor to Yosef saying: חלום חלמתי - “I have dreamt a dream, but no one can interpret it. Now I heard it said of you that you comprehend a dream to interpret it.” Pharoah ascribes a tremendous amount of power to Yosef, that he alone can interpret the dream. Yet Yosef responds: ״בלעדי אלוקים יענה את שלום פרעה״ – “That is beyond me; G-d will respond to Pharoah’s welfare.” Rashi explains Yosef's response, “That is beyond me” as:  “The wisdom to interpret dreams is not mine, rather ‘G-d will respond’ that is, He will put a response in my mouth ‘for Pharoah’s welfare’” (Bereishit 41:15-16).

The Mesiach Ilmim (רבי יהודה כלץ), a commentary on Rashi, expounds on this as follows: The word בלעדי does not mean “׳without me”; Yoseph did not tell Pharaoh, “I will not answer. for G-d is the one who will respond instead.” Yosef was actually saying that although the capability of interpretation comes from G-d alone, Yosef would act as the conduit in relaying G-d’s message. Rather than remove himself from something he was incapable of doing, he recognized his position as G-d’s messenger.

The Malbim as well says that Yosef told Pharoah that the ability to interpret the dream was not dependent on him alone. And that if G-d wanted Pharoah to know the meaning of his dream, He would he send the answer through some other avenue, including another person. Again, Yosef is minizmig his role as the sole, and correct interpreter of Pharaoh's dream. Yet Yosef listens to dreams and indeed offers his own interpretation.

Why does Yosef do this? Why does he first attribute all credit to G-d, thereby lowering his own importance, but yet continue to interpret the dreams?

Yosef understood inherently, that although he was not G-d who carried the power of interpretation. He still understood his unique position in world history. That he was placed in this situation to be a messenger for G-d’s word. Despite knowing that something was beyond him, he nevertheless stepped into the role that Hashem ordained for him.

And because Yosef did this, ascribing everything to G-d alone, the Midrash Tanchuma (4) tells us that G-d proclaimed: ‎ “Since you did not seek to exalt yourself, be assured you will be elevated to greatness and leadership by Me”. Yosef, in lowering himself, was really the catalyst to his being raised up.

This is such a powerful idea for us, for so often we are confronted with challenges that may seem impossible, which feel like they can only be overcome by G-d himself! Or perhaps we have lofty goals that we feel incapable of accomplishing. We learn from Yosef, that if we let go of our fears and recognize that the results are ultimately decided by G-d alone and accept that we are merely His messengers, we can overcome any challenge and reach heights of wisdom that we could not fathom to have reached on our own. 

Yosef shows us, that we should not cower in the face of daunting tasks, but rather we view ourselves as agents able to channel the energy of the All-powerful King, for Whom no challenge is too great. In that light, we can do anything with His help.

This is a fitting message for the holiday of חנוכה, when Hashem “delivered the strong into the hands of the weak, the many into the hands of the few…” Rather than capitulate when faced with the sheer absurdity of the imbalance, both in numbers and strength, the חשמונאים trusted in G-d. Their shortcomings did not cause them to fear, but instead to submit themselves to Hashem’s mission, and they emerged victorious.

This should give us chizzuk in all our endeavors, small and great. With G-d’s help, may we grow and accomplish the so called “un-achievable”.

Shabbat Shalom

Chanukah 5778 - Comforting Lights

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Rabbi Naftali Kassorla

Chanukah 5778

Comforting Lights

The D’var Torah for this week is dedicated in memory of:
ר׳ אלחנן יעקב ז״ל בן מורי וחמי ר׳ שמואל פנחס

If you are interested in sponsoring a D’var Torah in honor or in memory of someone, or for any occasion, please email: ParshaParagraphs@gmail.com

The Midrash Rabbah in Eicha (2:13) tells us:

חכמה בגוים תאמין תורה בגוים אל תאמין

Wisdom among the non-Jews, believe. Torah among the non-Jews, do not believe.

This became very clear to me while listening to a certain politically Conservative podcast. The program host, a Christian who considered himself well-versed in Judaism, was lauding the virtue of Christmas in comparison to other holidays around this time of year. Starting with Kwanzaa, he discounted the newest holiday because it was started by a well-known communist extremist, and is meant to celebrate Black Power – hardly religious in nature. I nodded my head in agreement as I listened. He then moved on to the Winter Solstice (also known as midwinter) which is an astronomical phenomenon marking the day with the shortest period of daylight and the longest night of the year. It was celebrated by Pagans in Scandinavian countries. It has now become popular in New-Age movements to celebrate “Mother Nature” along with other Paganistic ideas. Again, I was nodding my head in full agreement.

Then he moved down the list – to Chanukah. The holiday on which we commemorate both the great miracle of the oil, and the extraordinary military victory over a foreign invader. The host, forced to admit that it was obviously much older than Kwanza, and more religiously-themed than the Winter Solstice, began explaining how Chanukah is a “less significant” holiday in the Jewish calendar. This is marked by its non-biblical origin, the fact that it does not have a prohibition of work (איסור מלאכה) like on Rosh Hashana and Yom Kippur, and that there is no completely distinct prayer service to commemorate it. He went on to explain that the tradition of gift-giving was really started by a Reform Rabbi in Cincinnati, in an attempt to mimic the practice of Christmas. Thus, the host concluded that Christmas is far more superior, the birthday of his “savior”, the day of gift giving and merriment.

At this point my blood my was boiling. It disturbed me tremendously to hear this assault on our beloved holiday; to hear his faux triumphalism in his promotion of Christmas over other holidays. Nevermind that Chanukah predates Christmas by hundreds of years, or the paganistic origins of Christmas. Not to mention its ahistorical and arbitrary claim to be the birtdate of Jesus. It bothered me so much to hear such a warped characterization of Chanukah – what we as Frum Jews live each year.

But after further contemplation, hearing this unfounded critique ultimately led me to a much deeper and meaningful appreciation for our respected Chazal and for the נס of Chanukah which we celebrate.

We find in Parshat Beha'alotcha, in reference to the lighting of the Menorah in the Mikdash: “Hashem spoke to Moshe, saying, ‘Speak to Aharon and say to him: When you kindle the lamps, towards the face of the Menorah shall the seven lamps cast light’” (Bamidbar 8:1-2). The task of lighting the Menorah in the Mikdash was entrusted to Aharon HaKohen.

The preceding parsha, Parshat Naso, featured the inaugural offerings of the נשיאים, where each tribe was represented. The juxtaposition of these parshiot raises a question: The portion featuring the Menorah and its directives appeared earlier in the Torah, prior to the parsha of the Nesiim. Thus we would have expected the chapter on preparations for the Menorah to occur earlier as well. Why is it here instead?

The Be’er Basadeh (a commentary on Rashi) tells us that the placement of these parshiot one after the other shows that there must be a direct connection between the lighting of  the Menorah and the offerings of the Nesiim. Therefore, Rashi quotes the Midrash Tanchuma: Why was the passage dealing with the Menorah placed next to the passage of the Nesiim? Because Aharon saw the inauguration, and he felt badly, for neither he nor his tribe was represented among them. G-d, seeing Aharon's sadness tries to comfort him: ‘I swear by your life, your portion is greater than theirs, for you kindle and prepare the lamps.’”

The Ramban asks a very strong question: Why is Aharon only comforted now – by the Mitzvah of the Menorah? Why wasn't he comforted with the Ketoret, a service done everyday – morning and night? Why isn’t he comforted by the entire Yom Kippur service – the holiest of the year! Only he was privy to entering the Holy of Holies, something the other tribes were not allowed to do. In light of these questions, the Ramban (quoting Rabbeinu Nissim Gaon) says that the mitzvah of Menorah is not only that of the Menorah in the Mikdash, but it is also referring to the miracle of Chanukah, and the mitzvah of נרות חנוכה, which would last forever. That is Aharon’s everlasting comfort.

Chanukah is not a new invention. It’s manifestation was preplanned thousands of years before. And its performance would continue long after, under any and all circumstances. Whether it would be the Jew kindling flames in the concentration camps under intense fear of being caught, or myself – blessed with the opportunity to light in ירושלים. These candles serve as a comfort to the Jewish People, just as it did for Aharon so many millennia ago.

Our Chazal, in the tradition handed down to us, give us the lense with which we perceive and approach our Holidays. To even begin to compare and contrast Chanukah’s characteristics with the more modern-day, man-made holidays is to cheapen it beyond belief. This holiday, rooted in an idea from Hakadosh Baruch Hu himself, was enacted by Chazal. They help us to truly understand our history and imbue our daily lives with the lessons we have learned. This holiday, far from being less significant, is an opportunity for us to appreciate the legacy which we carry, and the wisdom from whom we have received it. A whole body of tradition that goes all the way back to Har Sinai – something no other holiday or other religion can ever claim.

Chanukah Sameach

Parshat Vayeishev 5778 - The Measure of Holiness

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Rabbi Naftali Kassorla

Parshat Vayeishev 5778

The Measure of Holiness

The D’var Torah for this week is dedicated in memory of:
ר׳ אלחנן יעקב ז״ל בן מורי וחמי ר׳ שמואל פנחס

If you are interested in sponsoring a D’var Torah in honor or in memory of someone, or for any occasion,
please email: ParshaParagraphs@gmail.com

In this week’s parsha we learn the tragic event of the selling of Yosef, by his brothers no less. This was spurred by Yosef sharing his dreams with his brothers, which engendered negative feelings from them, as the brothers assumed them to be dreams of grandeur. Additionally, Yaakov gives Yosef a special coat signifying Yaakov’s love for him. Fearing Yosef to be a threat, the brothers decide to dispose of him, initially wanting to have him killed. But due to Reuven’s intervention, the brothers decide to instead sell Yosef to merchants heading down to Egypt.

Thus begins the the arduous exile of the Jewish people in the land of Egypt. Yosef is thrown into servitude in the house of Potiphar. Quickly proving himself to be capable, Yosef is appointed to a position of authority in the household. Potiphar’s wife is drawn towards him and seeks to tempt him. Yosef overcomes this test and commits no crime, but in response to the wife’s accusations, he is nevertheless imprisoned.

There is a fascinating Gemara in Sotah (36b) which contrasts this episode with another from the sedra: that of Yehuda and Tamar. Tamar cunningly leads Yehuda to father a child through her, and Yehuda openly admits to being the father. He does so despite severe embarrassment, having already sentenced Tamar to death for her actions and subsequently needing to retract his condemnation in full view of all. Thus he was given the זכות that his name יהודה contain the letters of G-d’s ineffable name, י-ה-ו-ה. The Gemara goes on to say that this differs from Yosef’s name, which only includes part of Hashem’s name: י-ה-ו (based on תהילים 81:6, where the Gemara explains that the letter ה was added to Yosef's name, spelling יהוסף). The Gemara then elaborates with great detail the story of Yosef and the wife of Potiphar, how difficult a challenge it was and the extent to which Yosef went not to succumb to temptation.

In juxtaposing this with Yehuda’s act of strength, the Gemara seems to imply that Yosef somehow fell short! As such, he was not granted a merit as high as Yehuda’s. On the other hand, the Gemara appears to be praising Yosef for his great accomplishment. How then is that an explanation for why Yosef was not as meritorious to have G-d’s name fully reflected in his name?

I would like to provide an answer to this question. In a discussion on the topic of יחוד, Rav Aharon Lopiansky שליט״א, Rosh Yeshiva of Yeshiva Tiferes Gedaliah in Silver Spring, quoted his Rebbe Rav Chaim Shmuelevitz זצ״ל saying: When it comes to the world of עריות (licentious behavior), the measure of success is not based on whether one falls prey in the moment or not. Rather, the true test is to have the wisdom and foresight to plan accordingly to take the necessary precautions, not to put ourselves in a precarious position to begin with. Thus, says Rav Chaim, this is the depth of the prohibition of יחוד, for it guarantees that a person will not even find himself in a challenging situation in the first place. One who is careful with these halachot itself has already passed the test.

With this in mind, we can now attempt to understand Yosef Hatzadik, who is known throughout Rabbinic and Kabbalistic literature and the paragon of holiness and purity, and the Gemara’s apparent critique despite his having overcome his Yetzer Harah. For perhaps we can say (in our incredibly superficial understanding of his motives and actions) that Yosef should not have allowed himself to be in the situation to begin with. The fact that he overcame the temptation, while showing great strength and surely deserving of praise, does not exempt him from making sure he does not find himself in a place where he is tempted. A true showing of success in this area would have been the extent to which he went to avoid such circumstances.

Perhaps this may be what the Gemara is addressing in telling us that Yosef was not meritorious as to have his name fully reflect that of G-d’s. *

It is important to reiterate that we cannot fully ascertain the true understanding of both the Gemara and Yosef's actions, but we can take this as lesson to internalize: we must not allow ourselves to be placed in precarious situations where we are likely to be tested. Post facto, if G-d forbid we have indeed succumbed, the correct course of action is not to wallow in sadness, for clearly, once in the situation, it is not beyond the realm of possibility that the challenge may have been too great for us to handel. Rather, at that point the real test is to take a lesson for the future, to make the proper סייגים (precautionary measures) to ensure that it will not happen again.

This message is surely timely with the myriad of accusations of inappropriate behavior in the news daily by supposedly“prominent” public figures, this should spur us to both strengthen our behavior and increase our respect the clairvoyance of our Chazal. May Hashem grant us the strength to resist any negative temptations that come our way, and may we all have the wisdom to always put ourselves in places that will be conducive to growth, happiness and greater avodat Hashem.

Shabbat Shalom

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*In fact, the Gemara [ibid.] quotes an opinion that interprets the verse: …ויהי כהיום הזה ויבא הביתה לעשות מלאכתו “And it was on that day that he entered the house to do his work” (39:11) – he went to fulfill his “needs” with her, i.e. to have relations with her. Meaning that he indeed went with the intention of sinning. Even according to the alternate opinion, that he went to do actual work, he still should not have been alone, having known Potiphar's wife had tried to seduce him in the past.

However according the above, one could ask: Yehuda himself also should not have put himself into the situation with Tamar! So what is the great praise of Yehuda, in comparison to Yosef? Seemingly, Yosef is even more praiseworthy, for he didn't succumb to temptation, while Yehuda did in fact “give in” in being with Tamar. Perhaps we then need to take into consideration the explanation of Yehuda’s actions according to the Midrash and the דעת זקנים, which says that an Angel forced Yehuda to pursue Tamar, thus by removing his free-will, he is not held accountable.

The great act of strength we are highlighting about Yehudah is not whether he gave in to temptation of עריות, but rather the fact that he later admitted to his sin, and for that he is rewarded.