This week's parsha describes the tense encounter of Yaakov with Eisav; it is the first time they have met after Yaakov “bested” him, in receiving the blessing from their father, Yitzchak. Eisav, having waited for Yitzchak to die so he could exact his revenge upon Yaakov, collects an army of 400 hundred men and approaches Yaakov. In his fear and anticipation of this showdown, Yaakov prepares accordingly and places his children and wives in separate camps to ensure that there will be at least some survivors.
Yaakov's preparation included gifts for Eisav – a large quantity of animals – in order to steer Eisav away from his rage. Finally they meet. Yaakov is completely self-effacing, bowing towards Eisav in a show of deference. Eisav (as Rashi explains) is overcome with mercy and runs towards Yaakov to embrace him, even kissing him. Yaakov's attempts to appease Eisav do not stop there. He entreats Eisav to take the gifts that he had prepared for him, exclaiming: “Please accept my homage, which was brought to you” (33:11). Interestingly, the Torah uses the word ברכתי as opposed to מתנה or מנחתי – which would be more fitting for the context. Even more curious, is that the Torah previously used the word מנחתי when referring to these gifts (32:14). Rashi, seemingly bothered by this change, explains that in fact ברכתי does mean מנחתי. But still, why change now? What is the significance of Yaakov using the word ברכתי instead of מנחתי?
I believe that Yaakov was trying to send a message to Eisav. In confronting Yaakov, Eisav is faced with the tremendous blessings that G-d has bestowed upon his brother; Eisav sees first-hand Yaakov's great riches, a clear culmination of the blessings of Avraham and Yitzchak, which Eisav felt he was supposed to receive. By using the word ברכתי, Yaakov was trying to reference the blessing. But if so, how can Yaakov seemingly offer up the blessing to Eisav? Did Yaakov not go to great lengths to receive it in place of Eisav? How could he “give it back” now?
This was the message that Yaakov wanted to send: The value of the blessing was not materialistic; it was not a blessing for riches nor for honor. The blessings of Avraham and Yitzchak are so much greater than that. They are a mission: a life of purpose and of meaning for ourselves and for others. Yaakov was, in essence, saying, “Eisav – if you perceive the blessing so superficially as to think the sum of its parts is just materialism, then yes – take it” But in no way was Yaakov giving the blessing away, rather he was sending a message of what it’s true value is.
This message is very powerful for myself and my family, especially now. This past Monday night and Tuesday marked the first Yahrtzeit of my esteemed and beloved brother-in-law, Rabbi Elchonon Zomber zt”l. There is no one I can think of who embodied this message as well as Elchonon. He lived a life of meaning and of giving, above and beyond one of mere superficiality. He submitted himself to a path of true depth: teaching his students, both Torah and Math. Anyone who met him immediately sensed how incredibly talented and capable he was; he could have used his tremendous mind for his own self aggrandizement, or his own pocketbook. Yet he chose to devote himself to something much higher, much deeper, and ultimately more meaningful for a myriad of people. Nothing gave him more fulfillment than to see his students grow, mature, and ultimately succeed, and he cherished being a part of that process. The impact of his untimely death on our own lives is truly immeasurable, yet we take solace in that fact that we can use it as an opportunity to learn from his life and become better people, creating everlasting merit for his neshama.
Yehi Zichro Baruch
Shabbat Shalom
