Parsha Paragraphs
Rabbi Naftali Kassorla
Parshat Vayeira 5778
Mistaken Identity
The D’var Torah for this week is dedicated in memory of:
ר׳ אלחנן יעקב ז״ל בן מורי וחמי ר׳ שמואל פנחס
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Our parsha this week begins: וירא אליו ה׳ “Hashem, appeared to him in the plains of Mamre” (Bereishit 18:1). Rashi comments that G-d's appearance was for the purpose of ביקור חולים, visiting Avraham who was ill, following his circumcision. Interestingly, the Torah does not name who is actually being visited by G-d.
Rav Yaakov Kenizel, in his commentary on Rashi, notes this difficulty in the text; how does Rashi know that G-d’s intention was to visit Avraham because he is ill? He explains that Rashi knew from the fact that the Torah does not identify Avraham that our parsha must be a continuation of the previous parsha which concluded with Avraham performing a circumcision on himself. Therefore there was no need to explicitly identify Avraham. (Thus, it must be that G-d was appearing to Avraham, and it was done with the intention of visiting the sick.)
Why does the Torah not formally identify Avraham? Why must we rely on such an obscure inference which determines to whom G-d is appearing?
Perhaps there is a deeper message hidden here. As we know, G-d comes to visit Avraham in his pain. After Avraham undertook the arduous mitzvah of ברית מילה, Hashem comes to “perform” the mitzvah of ביקור חולים – visiting the sick, so to speak. The Midrash explains that in order to curtail the burden upon Avraham, G-d even made the day hotter. This would prevent people from travelling and passing by his tent, lest Avraham extend himself to tend to them.
All this was with the intention of alleviating the strain on Avraham. We all understand that when a person is sick, they are not “themselves”; they don't look their best, and they are not “at their best.” This is true, whether due to a serious illness (G-d forbid), or because of something as simple as a mild headache or toothache. Unfortunately, it is easy to judge or conclude that their behavior, when in pain, is indicative of their true nature, when in truth, it certainly is not.
This idea is born out in a vivid and difficult memory. I knew someone who throughout his life was to me a paragon of sensitivity and menschlichkeit. Unfortunately, he was stricken with terrible illness to which he ultimately succumbed. I watched painfully as this great man, over the time he received treatments, became bloated and immobile. He lost his hair, and due to his incredible pain, he would lose his temper as well. It was almost as though he was a different person. This person who I adored for so many years and admired for his care and sensitivity to his spouse, was now irritable and moody towards her. It felt so incongruent – how could this happen? How could a person undergo such a drastic change? Was this who he really was deep down? How could all those years of sterling character traits vanish in such a short amount of time? I struggled to make sense of what I was witnessing.
That was until I learned this parsha. Then I understood this important lesson in ביקור חולים, and basic, general empathy. In not identifying Avraham by name, the Torah teaches us that when in pain, a person is not necessarily “himself”; that pain and difficulty can take over a person, and become an impediment to him being the person who he really is. The self is buried under the difficulties that they are bearing. And we, the onlookers, must understand that this isn’t representative of their true, best version of themselves.
However, our message does not end there. When we look further we see that this episode is a testament to the tremendous trait of חסד (kindness) that Avraham possessed. For despite his deep pain, he so desired to perform the mitzvah of הכנסת אורחים (hospitality) and we see, both in the written Torah and in the Midrashim, the great effort that he exerted towards it.
As mentioned previously, G-d made the day hotter to stop travellers, lest Avraham over-exert himself in serving guests. Yet the Midrash says that when G-d saw how dejected Avraham became, He sent the Angels to Avraham’s tent. Why, after all of this, does Hashem “relent” and send the Angels? Wouldn’t this still run into the issue of inconveniencing and even hurting Avraham? What changed?
Again, this portion only bespeaks the great praise of Avraham, who lived on this high spiritual level and was able to overcome his pain. For us, it is not so easy. He was clearly experiencing greater pain by not having guests than by the physical pain he endured from the Brit Milah. Thus in the end, G-d did send the angels to him. But we are not Avraham Avinu, and we do not expect that of ourselves – all the more so of others! What we can do though, is strive to better understand the pain and empathize with those who find themselves in these difficult situations.
This should serve for us as a lesson in empathy and love for others around us. May we continually grow to be the best version of ourselves.
Shabbat Shalom
